Trelograms #9 — How Do You Know If You Are Ready?

I’m getting married.

The Newsfeed Eradicator Chrome extension replaces all the whining and cat pictures in your stream with motivational quotes. This was one of my favorites so far:

“If I had to live my life again, I’d make the same mistakes, only sooner.” (Tallulah Bankhead)

Am i ready to settle down? When will i be? — after i ride my bicycle to Cape Agulhas? — climb Everest? — go to the Moon?

I have decided to go against what i have perceived to be an individualistic trend upon which marriage is increasingly seen as a contract to which two independent parts contribute equal shares of the effort — rather, i’ve come to understand it as a partnership in which two interdependent parts each contribute their best effort, and share the results equally. As such, i don’t see how there could be any such thing as ‘being ready to get married’ — either you want to structure your life that way, or you don’t.

Well, i do! We are best friends. We have peeled our bodies, minds and souls naked to each other, and are (mostly?) fine with what we’ve seen — nothing goes unsaid — we share the strongest intention to connect i’ve ever experienced, and the safest space i’ve ever created with someone else — a million orders of magnitude over. I want to stay in Ukraine to build a home to come back to from my adventures, and she wants to be part of that — congratulations!

got no time or money to travel? — i beg to differ!

I am hard at work on a budget long-term traveling tutorial consolidating all i’ve learned over my past two years on the road — sign up for the Not Mad Yet mailing list, and be among the first to hear about it when it’s out!

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On the photo: my Goddess (November ’17)